Monday, July 1, 2013

Week 12: No Chemo!! What did the doctor order??? Some good friends??



Today is week 12,  2nd week in a row with NO CHEMO!!! I could get used to this!! (ONE DAY!!)
It's a little bitter sweet today.... exactly 3 months ago we started this journey. WOW is what I'm thinking..... 3 months of this, yet ONLY 3 months have gone by.
I'm so happy we are 3 months down but so sad we haven't even reached half way yet. (ALMOST THOUGH)!
I'm not gonna lie, this is one of the toughest trials of my life. I've been to the darkest lows and the happiest highs all in 3 months. Sometimes, a lot of times, all in one day. I've been beyond the point of giving up and my sweet sweet husband has had to pick up my crying pieces and lift me back up again. Yet I've been on a mountain of pure blessings and miracles that I've never thought possible. I'm still being humbled and I know I'll be pushed even further but I have so many GOOD SOLID FRIENDS that are here at a seconds notice. And of course I have my MOM.
I got down right mad the other night when Riley was in the bathroom looking in the mirror and I said "what you looking at? That handsome boy in the mirror?" he got so mad and said "no, I hate myself, I don't want to be bald." I think at that moment I picked up the pieces of my heart off the bathroom floor. I laid by him that night until about 3:00 a.m. just watching him, so angry that my little boy looks like this and "hates" himself. How is this fair? And what as his mom can I do about it?

I went and had a nice visit with our stake president, Pres. Claire, he is so nice and loving, he just cares. He gave me some good advice and good things to remember and apply to my life. But most of all, he let me breathe. He let me know everything I am feeling is valid and okay and he lifted the darkness over me and let me JUST BREATHE.
The other night as Riley was going to bed he looked at the ceiling and said "mom, why are those things on the ceiling always in my room at night and there not anywhere else?" I said "what things?", he said "all those dots all around the room, can't you see them? They are everywhere." ... No baby, I can't but I know they are angels looking over you. We are not alone and that brings great comfort.

As for the other days of the week, Riley has felt so good, other then his feet and legs hurting off and on, but he is doing amazing! We even had his counts done last Monday and of course we were border line on his red blood cells, but once again his body fought hard and we didn't end up needing a transfusion!
Riley's still pretty tired and gets worn down quickly so he still spends a lot of time in the house. But last Thursday..... nothing was going to stop him from getting out and playing with B man AKA Boston!!! The Augers are back from Australia for a visit which are our BEST FRIENDS!!!

Ri actually wanted to go on a bike ride with them!! Even if it only lasted a couple of blocks!!

I think it's just what the doctor ordered!! They had a ball! It's been almost 9 months since they saw each other and they picked up right where they left off!! Hunter and Boston have been best friends since they were 2, no kidding!!
Playing in the mud like the good ol times!!
I even broke some rules and let Riley play in the sand box too...... of course with restrictions!!

Riley had a hard time when the kids first wanted to see him, he said he didn't want them to see him. He is so self conscious right now, but we eased into it and he's okay with it now!
There's Lillie!! They are 6 months apart and we have some good pics.... maybe to use at a future wedding?? :)
All the world was right for one more day..... SATURDAY!!
Riley and dad stayed home and Hunter and I had the best time out on the lake for some much needed time together AWAY from the house and feeling like normal for just a bit!!
We've been couped up LONG enough and we took full advantage of it!!!
Paxton, Jaren, Hunter and Boston!!!
BESTIES!!!
Katie, Calie and me.... don't forget the styrofoam cup!!
Thank you Calie and Dave for such a fun fun day out!!! Love you guys!!!

We'll be back to our world soon enough, but for now, we're going to enjoy another week off and build some much needed blood cells to get ready for next week!!



3 comments:

  1. This was a happy post and I still cried! Ha! What a great reunion it has been. So happy that the kids have picked up without missing a beat!!! And us too ��

    You are doing great. Continue to breathe! And be lifted up! Love you Brandy!!!

    Ps Riley Rocks

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  2. I am having some major fomo right now with a side of tears! Especially after seeing that styrofoam cup!! Miss you...and yeah for a happy week! Make sure you give katie a boob hug for me. ;)

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  3. Yay! I'm so glad for you guys!! So so happy that Katie and the kiddos are here to visit with you! Baaah! When you said don't forget the styrafoam cup, I totally thought you were referencing someone's bra cup had a styrafoam insert. So so funny! I'm so glad you got to get out just a bit, and that those are genuine smiles on Sweet Riley. He is so handsome! You're going to see the end of this yet! Keep on trekkin. You are amazing and can do this!
    Love you!

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