Monday July 8th: Chemo week 13 and scans

Today is the day that could change our course. It was what we were so anxious to do but also so scared at the same time. If the scans are good, then we can breath for another 3 months, if they are bad..... well, it's bad.
AND..... THEY ARE GOOD!!!
The ultrasound showed nothing alarming and the x-ray showed nothing but his STAPLES, which I didn't know he had, from the surgery!
As wonderful as this news is, I didn't feel the relief I thought I would. Maybe because we aren't in the clear.... heck, we won't be in the clear for years. I think a part of me can't let loose because if I do and the cancer comes back, I won't be able to deal with it. Anyways, how can I be happy about any of this while I'm watching my son still suffer???
I have many mixed emotions right now that I'm fighting with and it sends me from cries of anger to good cries all at the same time.

Riley getting the ultrasound! Watching his favorite movie Oscar!!

 Here is a picture of the ultrasound BEFORE we took the tumor out. The big mass on the left here, is the tumor, the smaller circle on the right bottom, next to that white thing is his other kidney. Crazy hun?! Your kidney should be the size of your fist.

Now, his intestines and other parts have filled in that gap where the tumor/kidney was. They said his good kidney has recognized that it has to do all the work, so it has become bigger in size to compensate. Which is really good!

We got his counts before they ordered chemo to make sure he is strong enough, his ANC is .8, with .75 being the cut off, he barely made it again. I think this is crazy after having a 2 week break that he is still this low. I now see how his body is getting slower at recovering.

Here are his counts:

WEEK:      1    2    3     4     5     6    7    8   9   10   11   12   13

  HGB:   14.1    12.9         ??      11.7      10.7    9.5   9.8   10.3   9.2   9.2   8.8   10.8   11.5                          (less then 8 is bad)   

  Hct:    41.8%    37.8%   35%  33.2    30.2   27.4    28.6   29.7   26.5   27.1   25.1   31.4   33.5                             (less then 24% is bad)   

  WBC:  10.5      4.7         3.6      4.2     2.3       1.9   6.3    3.7   3.9   2.8   1.9   2.6   2.85                                   (5.5 is a low normal)

  PLTS:   621      288        272    347   280      288   466   168    265   475  319  318  400                               (less then 30 is bad)    

 

ANC:   7.6       3.0          2.2     1.5    1.5          .6     2.4    2.3   2.2   .8  1.0   .6   .8                                  (less the 1 is bad, less then .5 is really bad)

Today he got Vincristine and Dactomycin. As well as a good dose of Zofran!
They did not keep him accessed to go home with fluids because "hopefully" his body has adjusted a little bit and he'll be able to tolerate it better.
Our new schedule for chemo is: EVERY 3rd Monday!!! Yay! 2 week breaks!!
So instead of smaller doses every week, we will get harder bigger doses every 3 weeks. I'm not sure which is better, Because it takes longer now to recover from the bigger doses.
His counts may not be high enough, so we can either have a home health nurse come out and take labs on Sunday or we can take a possible wasted trip to Primary's on Monday. Still not sure what to do!

TUESDAY July 9th:
RILEY IS SICK
He started throwing up Monday evening but went to bed around 10p.m. I put a dis-solvable Zofran in his mouth mid way through the night so he hopefully wouldn't wake up throwing up. It helped until about 8a.m. Since then though, he hasn't kept anything down and has thrown up about 8 times. He is so tired all he's done today is nap and throw up. He stays awake for about a half hour at a time, but just doesn't have the energy to even move.

This is when it's hard. To see him so sick like this tears my heart out.
My 7 year old knows how to help Riley when he's throwing up, if I happen to be in the other room for what ever reason. It's sad that this is normal for him. He's a GOOD GOOD Brother!

I'm trying to be grateful for the good times and know the bad times will pass but today it's to hard. A friend of mine said, "the hardest thing you'll ever do is sit and watch your child be sick and there's not a thing you can do about it." I AGREE.